The bookstore is easily one of the greatest establishments that I can never possibly be without, or try to replace. I can replicate the physical bank with my online banking account, the post office of old is being driven out by the email address, and I can receive a PhD online without ever having set foot in a classroom. The bookstore is that one place where I can always find an adventure, compelling information, and a nice cup of coffee. People have said to me: "Why don't you go to a library?", but my answer is that the bookstore is so incredibly different from a library and that the two can barely even compare. At libraries one is susceptible to rules concerning voice level and eating habits, dust within old volumes that will clog even the most powerful air filter, and a cataloging system in drastic need of anarchistic reform. At a bookstore, one can bypass these limitations and health hazards, and explore an ever changing world of mystery and wonder.
Although I am partial to small businesses, one particular bookstore has always tickled my fancy, and that is Barnes & Noble, especially one such branch in my neighborhood. At this branch the friendly employees don't mind if you sit and read all day long (trust me I have on a rainy day), there is a nice little Starbucks in one corner where they make my cappuccinos just how I like them (bone dry), and there are two floors filled with shelves stacked with a gargantuan amount of knowledge that would take years for my human mind to possibly comprehend. My favorite sections are the New Nonfiction section, where I can find many ideas to explore and gripe about in every life and this blog, and the Graphic Novel section, where I can easily read the expensive works in a short while without being forced to pay the exorbitant price.
Besides the books, these breathtaking and mystifying caverns of prized oracles possess scores of titles of magazines ranging through all interests, from the informative (such as TIME) to the freakish (such as American Taxidermist). Once I realized that I could sit and read magazines I rejoiced that I no longer had to make appointments at free clinics just to catch up on the times (no pun intended). My favorite stopping points in the queue are based in the works of the news (which being a student makes it incredibly difficult to keep up with), the political and economic climate (for I need to know if I will one day have a paying job in order to remain sane), upcoming consumer technologies (I'm a die-hard nerd), and fitness and health magazines (again, I'm in college and I maintain a rather unhealthy lifestyle). My girlfriend and I will grab stacks of magazines and then plant ourselves in various locations throughout God's gift to the world and save countless dollars on all the magazines that we would have bought if we had the money or the lack of sense to go out and read these for free. Nevertheless, we do spend a significant chunk of change at the Starbucks, as in order to survive our expeditions we must refuel with coffee drinks and pastries.
I hope that you all have similar love affairs with these glorified libraries, where one may read, eat, drink, and save money. If you have not yet escaped the treacherous landscape of the library I hope that you will be able to direct yourself to the nearest bookstore and one day achieve salvation; I hope that if you have had similar experiences with bookstores you will use my word samesicle.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Sunday, April 15, 2012
G 'n' T
To me, one of the most relaxing activities I can partake in, is sitting and watching mindless television after an arduous day of dealing with the perils and annoyances of work and every day life. The people who walk far too slowly, the traffic lights that changed far too quickly, and those coffee breaks that never seem to last long enough; all scattered to the breeze when I trudge through the door, drop my keys on the kitchen table, and land with an exhausted plop into my chair. When my girlfriend and I are in the same state I have her smiling face to look forward too; but, alas when she and I are apart, what must I look forward to?
I prefer to enjoy an ice cold gin and tonic, or what I call a G 'n' T, in order to provide a mild reprieve from that achingly lonesome feeling. I don't have any rocks glasses in my piece of shit apartment and have had to settle for the feeling of cold sweating petroleum-based plastic containing my sacred elixir, and I have to say that I prefer it that way. So it goes, after I sit down and realize that it is only a matter of time before I become far too comfortable and that my ass will be permanently be rooted to the seat cushion, I make myself a drink. Upon fetching one of the spotted and scratched glasses from the cupboard, I remove a chrome shot glass from the drying rack next to the sink. After stooping low to my liquor cabinet, I remove a one liter bottle of Beefeater London Dry Gin from its spot next to the broken toaster that I refuse to throw away. At the site of the guard who is said to stand at the base of one of world's most infamous torture chambers, the Tower of London, my proverbial tail begins to wag and my mouth has started to water by the time I set the bottle down next to my glass. I fill up the glass with plenty of ice, because one can never have too much ice (unless maybe you're the Titanic) and begin my ritual of pouring one shot into the glass and watching the ice melt slightly on contact with the 80 proof colorless liquor. I give myself a second shot because I feel that I have been a good boy today (my God, I'm turning into a dog). I fill the glass up to the brim with cheap tonic water that I buy at the store for seventy cents for a two liter bottle and stand back to watch my creation. If I were Dr. Frankenstein I would not yet be shouting "It's alive" quite yet, as I have yet to add the final touch. Drum roll please! I present to you: the lime wedge. I cut huge slices from a fat dark green fruit and squeeze the succulent juice into the glass before dropping the lime itself into the brew. I feel as though the lime skin gives it that special aroma that makes the gin and tonic what it is meant to be: a truly relaxing experience. I have tried to substitute with lime juice from concentrate before and have only ended up with heartburn. So my friends remember this one rule: the lime makes the drink. Now finally it is finished.
I trudge back to my seat, drink in hand, with a little more spring to my step than five minutes prior. Upon reaching my throne upon which I am the ultimate authority I command that I not take one sip for at least fifteen minutes. In my opinion, the drink tastes better when the ice has melted and the lime has permeated throughout the volume. After the agonizing allotted time has ticked by I take the sweating glass, put it to my lips, and sip the sweet nectar descended from the chalice of Dionysus himself. Now I can finally relax and enjoy my lonely night. Cheers!
I shall let you all know that I am not an alcoholic and do not require professional help. I only seek to enjoy the simple pleasures in life. If you have had similar experiences or relaxing rituals of your own I invite you to share and if you have experienced something similar I invite you to say samesicle.
I prefer to enjoy an ice cold gin and tonic, or what I call a G 'n' T, in order to provide a mild reprieve from that achingly lonesome feeling. I don't have any rocks glasses in my piece of shit apartment and have had to settle for the feeling of cold sweating petroleum-based plastic containing my sacred elixir, and I have to say that I prefer it that way. So it goes, after I sit down and realize that it is only a matter of time before I become far too comfortable and that my ass will be permanently be rooted to the seat cushion, I make myself a drink. Upon fetching one of the spotted and scratched glasses from the cupboard, I remove a chrome shot glass from the drying rack next to the sink. After stooping low to my liquor cabinet, I remove a one liter bottle of Beefeater London Dry Gin from its spot next to the broken toaster that I refuse to throw away. At the site of the guard who is said to stand at the base of one of world's most infamous torture chambers, the Tower of London, my proverbial tail begins to wag and my mouth has started to water by the time I set the bottle down next to my glass. I fill up the glass with plenty of ice, because one can never have too much ice (unless maybe you're the Titanic) and begin my ritual of pouring one shot into the glass and watching the ice melt slightly on contact with the 80 proof colorless liquor. I give myself a second shot because I feel that I have been a good boy today (my God, I'm turning into a dog). I fill the glass up to the brim with cheap tonic water that I buy at the store for seventy cents for a two liter bottle and stand back to watch my creation. If I were Dr. Frankenstein I would not yet be shouting "It's alive" quite yet, as I have yet to add the final touch. Drum roll please! I present to you: the lime wedge. I cut huge slices from a fat dark green fruit and squeeze the succulent juice into the glass before dropping the lime itself into the brew. I feel as though the lime skin gives it that special aroma that makes the gin and tonic what it is meant to be: a truly relaxing experience. I have tried to substitute with lime juice from concentrate before and have only ended up with heartburn. So my friends remember this one rule: the lime makes the drink. Now finally it is finished.
I trudge back to my seat, drink in hand, with a little more spring to my step than five minutes prior. Upon reaching my throne upon which I am the ultimate authority I command that I not take one sip for at least fifteen minutes. In my opinion, the drink tastes better when the ice has melted and the lime has permeated throughout the volume. After the agonizing allotted time has ticked by I take the sweating glass, put it to my lips, and sip the sweet nectar descended from the chalice of Dionysus himself. Now I can finally relax and enjoy my lonely night. Cheers!
I shall let you all know that I am not an alcoholic and do not require professional help. I only seek to enjoy the simple pleasures in life. If you have had similar experiences or relaxing rituals of your own I invite you to share and if you have experienced something similar I invite you to say samesicle.
The Annoying Laugh
We’ve
all heard it, that one person who has the weirdest laugh imaginable. Any funny
situation may be made exponentially funnier by the shear reaction to that
person’s laugh. I have a friend who laughs in such a way. I have described it
to his face as that of a cross between a hyena and a crack-smoking SpongeBob
SquarePants. I as well have been told that my laugh is funny. It can really be
described as a high pitched squeal that is a stark comparison to my normally
basal voice. However, when I say annoying laugh, I mean one that resonates from
that one person who laughs at everything.
Humor is good because it allows us to find funny situations in life. Laughter
is very good too because when we laugh we blow off steam, be it in a stressful
situation, or in one where someone has just told a great joke. There are many
appropriate situations where we might be inclined to laugh at something funny,
it could be an ironic situation or story, or watching someone get hurt or
scared by the common occurrences that life throws at them. However, such things
are within the realm of comedy and what continues to bother me about laughter
is when it comes from those people who laugh when nothing is funny.
Let
me put this into perspective. I work, like many people in this world, and at my
job I am regularly confronted by one person who has a very bubbly temperament.
By bubbly I mean those people who are always smiling and the smile bubbles of
their personality overflow and improve the daily lives of people in their
environments. However, this person is not the case as she regularly assaults me
with her bubbles. I feel as though I need a riot shield in order to protect
myself from this unavoidable onslaught. Anything I say to her results in an
uproar of giggles and uncontrollable laughter. Initially I thought that it was
funny; however, every single time after has irritated me to such a degree that
I cannot properly express in words. Perhaps I will have to invent a word to
describe it. (Please see the post below.) It has come to the point that I dread
seeing this person around the office because the slightest word could possibly
set her off. Some of you might think that she has feelings for me (my girlfriend
thought the same), albeit I have observed (and heard) her uncontrollable
laughter while conversing with anyone, it doesn’t matter if they attractive or
not, or either male or female. I write this not to put her down because she is
a nice person, but that laugh I cannot stand. If any of you out there feel the
same or have been in a similar situation, let me know, and if you have then, I
hope you will use the word samesicle.
Friday, April 13, 2012
On the Creation of Words
Language is all around us. It allows us to express our feelings and communicate with our neighbors. As we humans have evolved from our ape-like ancestors that hunted mammoths with stone tools, and into our current state of people who hunt digital pigs with digital bird-like projectiles, our language has evolved in order to express our new social styles, technologies, and ways of thinking. I believe that if you asked a 15th century Pope (the "big cheese" so to speak of the center of pop culture and social style of his time) where the nearest gas station was there would be a high possibility of him not understanding in the least bit what you were talking about. I use the preceding example in no way to disrespect the Catholic Church, but to demonstrate how language changes with the times.
Over the past two decades, since the rise of the Internet as a main form of communication and interaction between people, we can see that a number of words have been created, or have had new meanings made for them by social people with a collective need to express themselves. Let us take a look at Google. Before 1998, who would have heard of such a word besides Larry Page and Sergey Brin. The only people who could have conceivable have heard a similar term of googol (a numeric giant expressed as ten to the hundredth power) would be chemists, physicists, and mathematicians. However, after 14 years Google is a household term used to describe a digital machine that searches the web for anything you want through a series of well crafted algorithms and it is a publicly traded company that made a profit of $10 billion last year. I would say that's pretty profound accomplishment for the technological world.
Now, what comes to mind with the word "text"? Is it the words that you are currently reading? Yes, it is, but usually the first thing that comes to mind (especially for children of the new millennium) is a quick 160 or so character message of text sent from one person to another over a cellular phone. I refer to it as the day dreaming of the modern era. In days of old (the '70s) people stared out into space during a boring math class and imagined themselves doing more exciting things with their friends who they would see after class ended. Today, our technology has caught up with our need to be social and we can be always aware of what our friends are doing because of the great (and discreet) substitute for talking, now known as the "text message", much to the chagrin of our math teachers.
We also allow our need for new words to change the meanings of our grammar and usage, something that shakes old nuns and language teachers to their core. For instance, the word "like". The rise of Facebook and its rapidly approaching 1 billion members have turned this common preposition into a verb. It has made people start "to like" pictures and wall posts, even if they wish to show their displeasure when it comes to a post. Oh how I and many other Facebook users would love a "dislike" button. Mark Zuckerberg, if ever read this please honor our request.
Among those listed above, here are a few more words that have been added to our ever growing English language through popular usage:
Over the past two decades, since the rise of the Internet as a main form of communication and interaction between people, we can see that a number of words have been created, or have had new meanings made for them by social people with a collective need to express themselves. Let us take a look at Google. Before 1998, who would have heard of such a word besides Larry Page and Sergey Brin. The only people who could have conceivable have heard a similar term of googol (a numeric giant expressed as ten to the hundredth power) would be chemists, physicists, and mathematicians. However, after 14 years Google is a household term used to describe a digital machine that searches the web for anything you want through a series of well crafted algorithms and it is a publicly traded company that made a profit of $10 billion last year. I would say that's pretty profound accomplishment for the technological world.
Now, what comes to mind with the word "text"? Is it the words that you are currently reading? Yes, it is, but usually the first thing that comes to mind (especially for children of the new millennium) is a quick 160 or so character message of text sent from one person to another over a cellular phone. I refer to it as the day dreaming of the modern era. In days of old (the '70s) people stared out into space during a boring math class and imagined themselves doing more exciting things with their friends who they would see after class ended. Today, our technology has caught up with our need to be social and we can be always aware of what our friends are doing because of the great (and discreet) substitute for talking, now known as the "text message", much to the chagrin of our math teachers.
We also allow our need for new words to change the meanings of our grammar and usage, something that shakes old nuns and language teachers to their core. For instance, the word "like". The rise of Facebook and its rapidly approaching 1 billion members have turned this common preposition into a verb. It has made people start "to like" pictures and wall posts, even if they wish to show their displeasure when it comes to a post. Oh how I and many other Facebook users would love a "dislike" button. Mark Zuckerberg, if ever read this please honor our request.
Among those listed above, here are a few more words that have been added to our ever growing English language through popular usage:
- Muggle: a word that my spell check does not like (no pun intended) that arose through the immense popularity of the Harry Potter series. Thank you J.K. Rowling for your contribution.
- Yahoo: another search engine, created before the rise of Google.
- Xerox: a noun and the name of a company that has been shortened from the word xerography, or a photocopying technique, and is now the commonly used office verb "to xerox (something)"
- Samesicle: a interjection invented by my lovely girlfriend in order to express similar feelings and thoughts. Thank you my love for your contribution.
Welcome!
Welcome to Samesicle! Within this blog I will be discussing all the misfit thoughts, ideas, theories, and observations about my everyday life and the lives of people around me. Mostly all of these ideas come to me through the most random of occurrences and about the most random of topics. I intend for this blog to be thought provoking and I hope that you, my readers, may use a term that my girlfriend invented in order to describe her agreement with me on something that we both felt or were discussing at that time. We use this word very often and that word is samesicle. I hope that this word soon becomes a part of your daily vocabulary, especially if you agree with me on what I have to say. If you don't agree with, then that's fine too. Once again welcome and happy reading.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)